Dealing with Diet Noise
What is Diet Noise?
When we find ourselves in social situations, especially around the holidays, more often than not the conversation can turn to diet talk. In the simplest terms, diet noise is when you are subjected to other people’s triggering talk about what they are or aren’t eating and why.
What is unique about diet noise is that what and why one person eats the way they do is a personal decision, yet it's become socially acceptable to talk about these personal choices as if they apply to everybody.
I don’t know about you but I don’t care why a family member or friend is or is not eating something, what morality they’ve assigned to that choice, or why. Just as it is none of my business what medications they may be taking. Imagine if we talked about every personal decision the way we talk about food.
While this diet noise may not be intended to be triggering, how do we keep ourselves safe when it is?
1. Ignore
Diet noise often starts because its become a common conversation starter. While you may not have a choice in what someone decides to talk about, you have the choice about whether or not you want to engage in that conversation. You can choose to ignore and carry on as though the person hasn't said it, or you can choose to purposefully change the topic of conversation.
Strategy 1: Ignore and walk away. For example, your aunt at a holiday occasion tells you she is about to start X fad diet. Tell her you would be happy to catch up later, but you have more people to greet or need to use the restroom, and walk away.
Strategy 2: Gently steer the conversation towards another subject. For example, your aunt at a holiday occasion tells you she is about to start X fad diet. Rather than asking questions about how it works or why, perhaps bring up the fact that you're about to start a new pottery class or got a new phone.
2. Be Assertive
If you feel confident enough in the situation, you can simply ask the person to stop talking about food choices. This can sometimes be easier in your home as you can set the boundaries, and politely let people know that it is a diet talk free household. If you are respectful and polite but firm in your approach, there is nothing wrong with asking people to refrain from diet talk any situation. Lead into another topic of conversation if you do not want to discuss why you're avoiding diet or food talk (remember it's a personal choice, and nobody's business anyways).
For example, your aunt at a holiday occasion tells you she is about to start X fad diet. Response "Thank you for sharing, however I would prefer not to talk about diets or food at this event. Tell me, how is your dog doing?"
3. Return in Kind
When someone does engage in diet talk, you can approach the situation with an anti-diet and body positive response.
For example, your aunt at a holiday occasion tells you she is about to start X fad diet and intends to lose X lbs in the new year. Response "My new years resolution is to focus on body positivity and the health at every size movement, and to consciously avoid diet culture. I think it's more realistic to listen to our bodies than to throw money at a billion dollar industry that doesn't work."
Holidays are supposed to be a time of sharing and enjoying each other's company. We are more interesting than our food choices, so certainly there is something better to talk about and share at these occasions. Just because diet noise has become normalized doesn't mean we have to engage in it or go along with it. In fact, you may find that by setting boundaries, there are many people in the room who also appreciate avoiding diet noise during the holidays.
